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Business one-liners 99 & 100

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Business one-liners 99 & 100:


When all else fails, try the boss's suggestion.


When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate. When in charge, ponder.


When in doubt, predict that the present trend will continue.


When in doubt, take all the time you need to get all the facts, or all the time you have, whichever is less.


When in doubt, use brute force.


When in trouble, delegate.


When it gets to be your turn, they change the rules.


When it's you against the world, bet on the world.


When life hands you a lemon, make lemonade.


When properly administered, vacations do not diminish productivity. For every week you are away and get nothing done, there is another week when your boss is away and you get twice as much done.


Yuppie pregnant women don't go into labor, they go straight into management.


Business one-liners 100:


When reviewing your notes for a test, the most important ones will be illegible.


When someone says this is as bad as it can get, don't bet on it.


When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two weeks to clear. When there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.


When you don't have an education, you've got to use your brains.


When you drop change at a vending machine, the pennies will fall nearby, while all other coins will roll out of sight.


When the going gets tough, the smart get sneaky.


When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.


When the product is destined to fail, the delivery system will perform perfectly.


When they want it bad (in a rush), they get it bad.


When things are going well, someone will inevitably experiment detrimentally.

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