Sonny Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 Dilbert's words of wisdom Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it. Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue. Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they aren't there the first time, chances are you won't be needing them again. I don't have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the hell is the ceiling My reality check bounced. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key. I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier. You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo. Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt. Don't irreplaceable -- if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted. After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before. The more junk you put up with, the more junk you are going to get. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day. When bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves. If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a darn fool about it. Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.