Yep..More Ponderings

[Sonny]

Yep..More Ponderings:

I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead?"

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.

Why not modern Latin: VENI, VEDI, VISA - I came, I saw, I shopped.

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS.

Strange! No one ever says "It's only a game," when their team is winning.

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.

I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows. And a foundation leaks and a ball game gets rained out and a car rusts and...

If you don't like my driving, don't call anyone. Just take another road. That's why the highway department made so many of them.

Try a little kindness. As little as possible. Into every life some rain must fall. Usually when your car windows are down.

I love playing cards with children. They can't tell you're dealing off the bottom of the deck.

Remember: you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar...
Of course, how you spend your leisure time is your business.

A man's best friend is his dog. That's assuming you want a friend who messes on your carpet and drools on your newspaper.

If I won the lottery, I wouldn't be one of those people who immediately quit their jobs. I'd make my boss's life a living hell for a week or two first.

A rose by any other name would stick you just as bad and draw just as much blood when you grab a thorn.