Sonny Posted July 23, 2013 Share Posted July 23, 2013 AMNESIA: Condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to ever have sex again. BOTTLE FEEDING: An opportunity for Dad to get up at 2 AM too. DEFENSE: What you'd better have around de yard if you're going to let the kids play outside. DROOLING: How teething babies wash their chins. DUMB WAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert. FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when a baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots. FULL NAME: What you call your child when you're mad at him. GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are absolutely wonderful even though they're convinced you're not raising them right. HEARSAY: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word. IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid. INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say. LOOK OUT!: What it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it. PUDDLE: A small body of water that attracts other small bodies wearing dry shoes. SHOWOFF: A child who is more talented than yours. TEMPER TANTRUMS: What you should keep to a minimum so as not to upset the children. THUNDERSTORM: A chance to see how many family members can fit into one bed. VERBAL: Able to whine in words. WHODUNIT: None of the kids that live in your house. WHOOPS: An exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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