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By Sonny · PostedA guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed... driving his partner nuts. Finally his exasperated partner says, "What the heck is taking so long? Hit the ball!" The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot." "Give me a break! You don't stand a snowball's chance of hitting her from here."
Lexophiles (Lovers of words)
By Sonny · PostedEngland has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool. Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes. This girl today said she recognized me from the Vegetarians Club, but I'd swear I've never met herbivore. I know a guy who's addicted to drinking brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A. I got some batteries that were given out free of charge. A dentist and a manicurist married.
By Sonny · PostedI’m not having much luck with jobs lately: I couldn’t concentrate in the orange juice factory. I wasn’t suited to be a tailor. The muffler factory was just exhausting. I couldn’t cut it as barber. I didn’t have the patience to be a doctor. I didn’t fit in the shoe factory even though I put my soul into it. The paper shop folded. Pool maintenance was too draining. I got fired from the cannon factory. And I just couldn’t see